The face of adoption along with everything in between has changed immensely because of the practice and upcoming popularity of open adoption. Open adoption was not widely known or even considered when families wanted to begin the adoption process 25 years ago. Open adoption is difficult to define due to different degrees of openness in each adoption case. It is would be the relationship between both sets of parents that share information as well as both have contact with the adoptee.  The misinterpreted word, adoption, skewed many families away from the practice especially the biological mother. How does a mother cope with a decision that she would never know for sure if she did right thing? Open adoption might not be “better” for some adoptees as having two sets of parents can be a bit complicated even at the best of times. Adoptees can experience fear of abandonment, disagreement, and that spending too much time with one set of parents will upset the other. If both of the families in an open adoption are willing to comply and willing to put their child’s future first, can allow the adoptee to feel a sense of understanding of who they are and other benefits as well. Author McRoy of Openness in Adoption Exploring Family Connections explains that “Provision of an information link is expected to give the children a greater sense of continuity with their personal history and this to enhance their sense of self-esteem” (86.) Coming from personal experience as a closed adoption adoptee, I’ve lacked the enhanced self-esteem quality, as well as figuring out who I am and my need to search for my biological family. The type of adoption that an adoptee is placed in shapes their identity in a positive way. An open adoption for an adoptee creates a deeper understanding of who they are, where they came from, and provides other great benefits providing them with a loving and secure life.

The two main adoptions are opened and closed. These practices share some similarities but do have their many differences to set them apart from one another. Closed adoption is when there is no communication or contact between the parents plus adoptee and the biological family. The inability to communicate or know who the biological parents are might not be something that is permanent because at the age of 18 if the adoptee wishes to find them they may do so. The process can be lengthy and the biological parents may not agree to meet with the adoptee. Closed adoption is actually becoming rarer in the United States than Open adoption which to some is surprising. (FindLaw.) Then there is an open adoption which allows communication between the two sets of families, biological and adoptive. Open adoption varies in the degree of openness that works well for both sets of families. This type of practice is definitely favored towards the biological parents because they get to pick a family for their child knowing where and who their child is going unlike a closed adoption. The significance of this is that the biological parents get to ensure their child is in great hands and will result in the adoptee in a better lifestyle overall. Some questions that are essential to understand before getting into the benefits of an open adoption are the what ifs of the practice. Many people put off an open adoption due to the fear involving the biological family and that side of the situation. Biological parents will most likely not choose an open adoption practice if they experience that kind of feeling. There should not be a problem with the biological family in an open adoption being unwilling to contact the adoptee or presenting any resentment in having the adoptee. The different degrees in which open adoptions are involved with help both sets of parents customize their plane to make them both feel comfortable with the situation at hand. These practices have many pros and cons making the decision between open and closed adoption very controversial.

An open adoption does provide many beneficial identity factors for an adoptee but does have disadvantages as well. These disadvantages are reasonable in a situation such as an open adoption due to the complexity that comes with having two sets of parents. These disadvantages not just for the adoptee but everyone in the situation are mostly the possibilities. The list of what ifs can be long when talking about anything and that is when some people prefer to put those behind them, move forward, and grow with the unique practice open adoption. Some of the disadvantages for the birth parents involving the choosing process for the placement of their child: they may choose a wrong family before placement and be too afraid to change their minds about them and fear that the adoptive parents want more or less contact then what they agreed. For the adoptive parents its involving the possibilities with the biological family which can be: they could not be chosen by preferred family, change of mind by chosen preferred family, the fear that personal or medical information is being withheld from biological family, and the fear of more or less contact is wanted. Last but not least the adoptee has cons to an open adoption as well like: he may withhold from asking certain questions due to the feelings of both sets of parents, fears of abandonment, fear of choosing sides between the sets of parents, spending too much time with or enjoying something more with a set of parents could upset the other side of parents (Carney.) Now all these cons seem to be possibilities or the fear of a what if and the benefits of an open adoption allows those cons to be put to rest and allow both sets of families to place their child in a practice that will ensure lifelong security and happiness. 

An open adoption provides benefits for the adoptee when knowing where the adoptee came from. Just knowing where you came from eliminates many questions as well as issues finding vital background information later in life. The access to vital genetic information is very important especially when it deals with health history. A question asked a lot at the doctors is “Does your family have history of…?” and when in a time of need if this question is unknown could easily make the situation life or death. A woman in a closed adoption named Jeanne who went through the Department of Health to find out her ethnicity states, “The antiquated legal fiction of closed adoption is still preventing adoptees like me from learning vital information about our backgrounds, histories and genetic risk factors.” (Jeanne.) When being in a closed adoption, files such as these are hard to obtain as an adoptee. An adoptee has to be over the age of eighteen and not to mention the process is tedious. It was not until Jeanne was 32 years old when she started her understanding for her own heritage and identity. After her parents died she completed her paperwork from the NY State Department of Health to request just information on her biological parents. A whole year went by and right when she was forgetting she even sent in the paperwork in she got a huge letter from DOH and then she discovered information of her heritage information. She then registered for Adoption Information Registry which is where she would receive her biological parent’s medical history with their consent. As the date of this article on xojane.com in 2015, Jeanne told the readers she has not received any additional information. In each state, it can vary how easily accessible this information is but that still does not mean it is easy or in a timely manner. A trending topic people love to talk about is ‘what you are’ in the sense of ethnicity. Many people take pride in where they came from and even have family relics to symbolize it. An open adoption gives the adoptee access to this immediately knowing any family health issues and the knowledge of ethnical information. It could be as simple as phone call away for up to date health information and any answer on where the adoptees genetics came from. As of today, I do not have any knowledge of either of those things and this leads to a lack of sense of who you are. I feel a little lost in the world not knowing what my ethnical and biological heritage is which is something most people know about themselves. A sense of who you are is very beneficially when going through the teenage year as an adoptee.

 An open adoption provides benefits for the adoptee such as giving them the greater understanding of who they are. This allows the adoptee to be more emotionally stable as well as many positive emotional things involved with that. As McRoy stated that an open adoption can lead the adoptee with a greater “sense of self-esteem” (86.) Greater sense of self-esteem changes: the pride, self-respect, and dignity of oneself, as those are characteristics that are very beneficial to any person. Having little self-esteem is known to lead to depression and not knowing ones worth when in certain situation and relationships. Adoptees tend to ask themselves many identity questions such as ‘Who do I look like and why was I placed?’ but these questions are answered when placed in an open adoption. You know when you are hanging out with a group of people and you all start talking about who looks like who, their mom or their dad? It is a conversation people have at least once in their life. As an adoptee in a closed adoption I have been in many of these conversations and it can make you feel left out as well a bit uncomfortable when it comes to answer the dreaded question. In the same article with Jeanne, a closed adoption adoptee, questioned to herself “what was I like when I was a baby? Did I look more like my mom when I was born, or more like my dad?” (Xojane.) These answers were never really answered and has yet to receive any information on her heritage background. An open adoption allows for these questions to be answered with communication in pictures, email, phone, or visits. Growing up understanding why you were adopted is another burning question that could affect the outcome of who you are. Closed adoptees can be left with no to very little information on why they were placed for adoption. Wonder can leave the child unsatisfied, low self-esteem, and abandonment issues. Open adoption allows the child to understand why the birth parents were unable to provide for them. As this practice allows the adoptee to know where they came from and who they are it also creates a foundation for many relationships along the way. 

The new source of relationships that are going to be able to be formed with the biological family and their family allows for double the love and fun for the adoptee. Of course, it will get complicated at times and certainly will not be easy but for the adoptee to have a relationship with their birth family is very beneficial. With relatives, grandparents, and even siblings there is an immense amount of opportunities for the adoptee to connect and create dynamic relationships all around. In an article for The New York Time, Mr. Michael Winerip writes “On paper it keeps getting more complicated. Phelan and Tallulah are brother and sister, as well as cousins. But in person, it just seems like family.” (New York Times.) This article is about one biological family being in an open adoption with a very well rounded couple with a boy named Phelan. Then six years later the adoptive parents end up adopting the biological mother cousin’s baby, Tallulah. Exactly what Winerip describes it as “complicates” but “seems just like family.” No matter how eccentric the family can seem does not mean it is not a strong, loving, and secure family! Being someone in a closed adoption and knowing just what my birth parents know about my family history, I am limited in knowing a lot of information. My birthparents told me only what they knew of my biological mother and the information that I have two half siblings. Knowing this information and not being able to have a relationship with them at all really messes with the identity issue side of things.  A problem that many birth parents have a hard time choosing open adoption because of the undefined boundaries between the two set of parents. According to Adoption.org 

“Adoptees, even at a young age, are not confused about who their parents are. They understand the different roles of their birth and adoptive families.” As well as in the article from The New York Times, Winerip says,

“While it’s hard for outsiders to keep everyone straight, Phelan, now 6, seems to have a firm grasp on what’s going on. Looking at pictures with a visitor, he says: “That’s Moriah. She’s my birth mother. Camren, he’s my birth father. And that’s me with Mom and Dad. And that’s Granny Carmen” — his birth father’s mother. For Phelan, it’s meant more cousins and grandparents to play with.” (New York Times.)

These examples show that even though it is a complex big happy family that has a full understanding of everyone involved in the adoptees life. As an open adoption practice does have many benefits involving the adoptee, so does a closed adoption.

These benefits from a closed adoption can vary depending on the adoptee situation. A closed adoption is when the adoptee remains out of contact with the birth parents until eighteen and then at that time the adoptee has the choice to access information about other parties. Some of the benefits in a closed adoption is that the adoptee is protected from a potential unstable environment involving the biological parents that can create emotional issues on the child. The risk for any relationship complications are absent especially dealing with boundaries between both set of parents. Fuzzy boundaries are one of the biggest setbacks when a family decides between a closed and opened adoption. As these are reasonable benefits to consider when choosing between the two practices, the benefits of an open adoption outweigh those of the closed adoption. When researching the pros of a closed adoption the benefits found were only those of prevention of future potential emotional issues. Trying to prevent the adoptee from possibly having emotionally unstable parents could block the direct access to birth parents and their history. These adoptees are left with identity questions, abandonment issues, and the chance to have a dynamic family. Open adoption eases negative feelings about where they came from and answers many questions closed adoption adoptees are left with. Open adoption increases many potential, positive emotions and senses for the adoptee that outweigh the prevention of a few risk in a closed adoption. 

In conclusion, the benefits in both open and closed adoptions range and can conclude to be both excellent for each set of parents. Being a closed adoption adoptee I love my family and who I have become because of them and the beautiful place I live in. Meeting people who sculpted me into the person I love and would not change anything if given the chance. Choosing between the two practices seems nearly impossible in the beginning but hoping this outline of benefits towards the adoptee clarify decisions and perspectives. Open adoption might not be ‘better’ for some adoptees but needed a light shined on all the positive benefits given to the adoptee. Putting the adoptee first in a decision like this and ensure a healthy, happy, and secure future for them. Benefits in open adoption have a high potential of sculpting an adoptee to positive emotional outcomes and knowing one’s self worth. The risks of an open adoption make a small dent into the exceeding benefits of the practice, as the closed adoption limits risks for just half the amount of benefits. 
