
Let us talk about sex. I am not talking about how to pleasure a partner or how to avoid pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. I want to talk about sexual assault. Actually, I want everyone to talk about sexual assault. Although, there should not be much to discuss because it is against the law in every form. The fact that there is any confusion on what is sexual assault and what is not should be a red flag to society. What if some people thought murder was okay? Murder and death are generally thought to be the worst thing to happen to a person, but I believe that rape is worse because the survivor must live with it for the rest of his or her life. I made this comment on Yik Yak once and a survivor anonymously confirmed it. Similarly, one of University of South Carolina's own athletes tells people that she told her ex-boyfriend that he should have just killed her after he committed acts of domestic violence against her. I would like you to consider how much you think about sex on a daily or weekly basis.  Certainly it happens often and is pleasant or harmless. Now imagine your natural urges come with tears, trauma, and feelings of depression. Although sex is not a big part of everyone's life, it is a big part of life in general. It is so easy for survivors to be triggered considering the prevalence of sex in media today. Everyone knows that sexual assault is wrong but, not everyone comprehends all factors that define sexual assault. The number of people that do not understand the law are at risk for breaking it or allowing someone else to commit a crime against them. For this reason, sexual assault could be prevented because of better education of the specific laws throughout health classes prior to college.

The greatest opponents of sexual assault education are supporters of abstinence-only sex education for adolescents. Arguments made for this type of program includes that abstinence is the only absolute way to avoid teen pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases and many parents want abstinent children. Alean Zeiler, pediatrician and author of "Teen Sex Education Should Emphasize Abstinence Until Marriage," believes that "when it comes to sex education, adolescents need to be given clear direction repeatedly, as is done with programs that address smoking, drugs, and alcohol use" (Zeiler). While this approach does likely help prevent those activities, keep in mind that all of those activities are illegal for minors to do when they begin learning about them, unlike sexual activity which may begin at 16, 17 or 18 years old. This curriculum does not give attention to sexual consent and is ignorant to the fact that no abstinence-only program reports one hundred percent of students abstinent until marriage. Therefore, risk of rape is increased due to a lack of knowledge of laws against sexual assault and appropriate consent. Students that become survivors and perpetrators alike cannot even realize their cases are illegal.

As much as parents would like abstinent children, Amy Schalet describes her research in "The Sleepover Question" in order to persuade readers that Americans might be happier if they were more open to teenage sex, similar to the Dutch. She compared an American girl's experience to a girl's from the Netherlands. The American only had sex with her boyfriend when no one was around without her parents knowing, and did not enjoy keeping this from her parents. Meanwhile, the Dutch girl interviewed was happy to have approval of her boyfriend and the honesty brought her closer to her parents (Schalet 21). Schalet believes that "normalizing ideas about teenage sex in fact allows the Dutch to exert more control over their children" than American parents (Schalet 21). Similarly, American education systems can begin to control the prevalence of sexual assault by making consent a more comfortable subject so that all parties are understanding.

Is sexual assault even a serious issue on college campuses? The statistic of 1 in 4 college aged women being raped or attempted to be raped is so widespread, as it should be. That is equivalent to at least three females in my English 102 class alone being a victim of attempted or completed rape by the time we graduate. Renae Franiuk, who conducted experiments on students understanding of consent, believes that characteristics unique to college campuses that may contribute to higher rates of sexual assault "include the prevalence of alcohol, the proximity of men and women in their living and sleeping quarters, and increased exposure to others having sex" (Franiuk). These elements of college definitely can take some adjusting after living with a parent or guardian as a minor. Bonnie S. Fisher "found that 84% of the women who reported sexually coercive situations experienced the incident during their first four semesters on campus" (Fisher). Sexual assault education must reach people before this targeting of new students can occur. The transition to college from high school often features a lifestyle of more drinking and drinking more often. Time after time, this is used to a rapist's advantage and "an overemphasis on [drug-facilitated sexual assault] takes attention away from the true nature of campus sexual assault, ignoring the fact that most sexual assaults occur after voluntary alcohol consumption by the victim and assailant" (Fisher). This brings up the issue of victim blaming.

Victim blaming is literally blaming a victim for being sexually assaulted for whatever reason, usually being intoxicated or baring what some consider too much skin. Rachel Bell, author of "Sexualization of Girls Teaches Boys to Be Sexually Violent," wrote that "much of the media, the justice system and one-third of the public seem to think alcohol is raping girls. That by getting drunk, dressing sexy and flirting, girls and women are responsible for the horrific violence committed against them" (Bell). The fear of being blamed is a considerable reason why many assaults go unreported or reported with little action. This goes hand in hand with the fact that only eight percent of sexual assaults are committed by strangers to the victim (Bell). With a vast majority of rapes involving acquaintances, victims are less likely to be taken seriously by mutual friends or acquaintances, more likely to be blamed for the situation, and less likely to take legal action against someone they know. Because so many sexual assaults happen between acquaintances, I believe that consent education can prevent some cases.

Today, consent is being translated in legislation as "yes means yes" or "no means no." Evidently, college students definitions of consent do not necessarily include a verbal yes or no. Rather, consent is situational and certainly hard to prove. Earlier in the year, Amber Rose went on the show called It's Not You, It's Men. She said to Tyrese Gibson and Rev Run that "If I'm laying down with a man, butt-naked, and his condom is on, and I say 'You know what, no, I don't wanna do this. I changed my mind.' That means no" ("Amber Rose Meaning of Consent"). Rev Run accepted this but responded with a saying that goes "dress how you want to be addressed." Amber Rose criticizes this because just because she everytime she wears sexy outfits does not mean that she is looking for sex. Rose continues by saying, "I'm not mad at y'all because that's how society raised all of us" ("Amber Rose Meaning of Consent"). She is right about society being brought up to think negatively of a woman exposing a lot of skin and curves or having a lot of sex. This needs to change in order to stop the objectifying of women and men from believing they may use a woman's body if it is uncovered. A significant point that sex education programs should make is that clothing should never be assumed suggestive of sexual desire.

For Fatima Avellan, it is too late to go through sex education in school because she is graduated. She believe that the best way to engage college students in sexual violence prevention is to provide food or games and give college credit for volunteering at sexual trauma services, for example (Avellan).


