Jonathan Franzen's piece, "Liking is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts." was adapted from a commencement speech given to Kenyon College's senior class. In his speech, Franzen begins talking about the allure for new technologies. In his personal experience, he upgrades to a new Blackberry Pearl from the older Blackberry version. He goes on to say that our obsession with technology and the applications that come with it help mask our dissatisfaction and the fear in our lives and within ourselves. Franzen uses the function of technology in our lives to announce that there is more to life and we should keep pushing for more in everything we do. The importance of this speech on the graduating class no only inspires them, but everybody else in the room to go further in their passions not only for work but in their relationships as well. Franzen achieves this by effectively using Ethos and Pathos throughout his speech to help the argument. 

Franzen first uses Ethos, along with Pathos in the beginning statements of the commencement speech. He tells the audience a story of getting a new phone, and like everybody else, he was amazed with the new features and simply says that he was "infatuated with [his] new device," just as he once was with his old one (Franzen 512). By giving out this story, he is showing that he is relatable, therefore making his audience comfortable with him and making him seem trustworthy. He delves deeper into his relationship with his devices. He describes 

breaking up with his old BlackBerry as if it had a real personality  --  like he was breaking things off with a real person. Franzen says that his relationship with his old BlackBerry was "entirely one-sided" (512). Which is completely true, it just had not been thoroughly stated before. At this point, the audience is really keying in on what Franzen is going to continue with next. Not only is he proving that they can relax around him, but he is also revealing something so true that people had not thought about the validity of it until he said it aloud. The inclusion of his personal story appeals to both Ethos and Pathos. 

Next in the speech, Franzen discusses our consumeristic society. He says the technology industry has mastered the art of creating products to meet our demands, even when we have not discovered what our demands are yet. He says we yearn for the kind of devices that "asks for nothing and gives everything and makes us feel powerful," (Franzen 512) because these kind of relationships are the kind that we really physically and emotionally want in real life as well. With this realization from Franzen, he reveals something that is relatable by majority of Americans, therefore again establishing trust. He continues on the topic of technology by claiming that the goal of it all is for it to create an extension of ourselves. He also says that with that extension, we use our technology to reflect how we want ourselves to be (Franzen 513). Franzen gives continuous examples to help explain his ideas such as the idea of 'liking' pages on Facebook. The issue with liking things is that it is a ploy by consumer products. The businesses, the gadgets, and the social media pages all desire to be likeable, and they achieve that in their designs (513). He translates the idea as to a person trying deeply to be liked by the masses and this hits the appeal to Pathos. With that comparison, it instantly brings the human connection and makes the audience question even their own characters. Franzen says the technology products cannot have narcissistic tendencies because they simply not human, but they are "great allies and enablers of narcissism" (513). As humans, it is in our nature to crave approval and attention. That is why we use social media, take 'selfies' everywhere, and the likes and filters keep us content. Franzen says it best that, "we like the mirror and the mirror likes us" (513). The main claim of his argument is that we are comfortable with idea of liking and the use of consumer technologies blatantly expose that about ourselves. But Franzen says that liking is too boring and too safe. 

Franzen reveals that the problem with liking and trying to be likeable is that is just is not achievable in real life relationships. Liking is safe and easy, but to expose real compassion, a person must love. Now that trust had been established, Franzen appeals to Ethos again by showing the audience that he wants the graduating class to go out in the world and start loving  --  because liking is for the weak. Franzens says that you cannot like something or someone to their core, however you can love every piece of something or someone and that is why the "world of liking is ultimately a lie" (514). Franzen is not trying to discredit the use of the techno-consumer society, but actually show that obsessing over the materials keep a person from forming strong relationships, as well as keep the natural feelings of being alive from arising to the surface. These feelings like pain, anger and despair. Franzen says that these feelings are "what makes it so tempting to avoid love and stay safely in the world of liking" (514). With this claim, he appeals to Pathos because we can all agree that we do not like nor love feeling pained, or angry. 

Franzen's finale is another personal story where he concludes that instead of just walking the planet being a consumer  --  falling to the liking and disliking, that it is best to force yourself to go out and interact with people (515). It is better to make connections, and maybe even love those people, risking both rejection and pain. Franzen gathers that "to go through a life painlessly is to have not lived," (514) then he questions what the outcomes could even possibly be once they step out of the comfort zone. With those closing remarks, the appeal to Pathos and Ethos was effectively used. The appeals helped show that Jonathan Franzen was trustworthy, inspirational speaker. He proved that he was not trying to denounce technologies but simply tell the graduating class not be afraid to be more than just a person who likes. He proved that he wanted more for them, thus inspiring them to be more than just people who like, but love. 

