
Many relationships consist of both negative and positive feelings which cause the people to have mixed feelings. In the poem, Forgiving My Father by Lucille Clifton, a young girl expresses her concern and feelings about her family being in debt including the fact that her father does not help the situation at all. She resents her father for his irresponsibility’s, like never paying the money he owes because he is spending it elsewhere. The girl wishes that her father would have worked harder to pay it forward, but instead she accepts the fact that her father will never be able to get out of the debt he shamelessly put himself him. This poem is mostly negative because of the resentment and disappointment that the girl has for her father, but it also has some positive feelings because she has come to terms with her father’s actions and she knows that nothing will change. 

In many situations, people will find excuses and explanations in order to protect the people they love. In this poem, the little girl continues to think of reasons to excuse her father’s actions because she truly does love him. One prime example of this is when she says, “I wish you were rich so I could take it all and give the lady what she was due but you were the only son of a needy father,” (lines 10-12). Even though she knows her father will never pay up, she still tried to blame it on the fact that her grandfather was needy and since her grandfather acted in a similar way that her father does, she believes it is where her father got it from. She continued to find excuses for her father’s irresponsibilites so it would be easier for her to forgive her father. Most people want to keep their loved ones safe from the perilous real world. When she shows that she wants to protect her father from these actions it shows the slightly positive side of their relationship with him, even though it is mostly negative because of her resentment towards him. 

 It is hard to expect a lot from people who have nothing to offer. The little girl in this poem expects for her father to pay his dues because it is one of the responsibilities of a parent. When her father is not able to pay his dues she feels ashamed and disappointed in him. Therefore, she says, “you gave her all you had which was nothing, you have already given her all you had,” (14-16). These lines show that the girl is disappointed in her father and wants him to feel guilty for not working hard enough to be able to pay off his debt, but she also says that he had already given them all that he had to offer. Sometimes people give all that they have and they still come up short. That can be disappointing to others because they expect more from them. Many people expect to get what they give and most of the time that is unrealistic. This shows that their relationship is both negative and positive because she is still disappointed in her father and even though she is glad he gave all he had, she still wanted him to work harder to pay all that he owes. 

In the end, the daughter begins to accept the fact that her father was never be able to pay off his debt. She asks herself “Why am I here collecting? You lie side by side in the debtors’ boxes and no accounting will open them up,” (21-23). The daughter has accepted her father’s action which is a positive aspect of their relationship, but she has not forgiven them. She knows her father was never able to pay of his debt and now that he has passed away, she must accept the fact that his wrong doings will never be fixed.. When the daughter accepts her father’s actions and has hope it shows the positive parts of their relationship along with the negative parts, like the fact that she will not forgive him or that he will not be able to fully pay off his debt. 

Relationships between family usually involve negative and positive aspects. In this poem, the daughter and father have a mostly negative relationship. However, towards the end of the poem the girl forgives her father, which make the reader believe that they do not fully resent each other. Most of the negative feelings are coming from the daughter because she feels that her father is hopeless and will never pay off his debt. Forgiving My Father shows that not all relationships are fully negative or fully positive. In the end, everyone deserves to have somewhat of a second chance in order to redeem themselves of the wrong doings they have committed. 
