Theodore Roethke’s Poem My Papa’s Waltz is a poem that documents a child’s tiring love and struggle with an alcoholic father. The poem is a striving attempt to show how child abuse can be accidental and intentional, showing the reader that sometimes even a parent with a history of abuse isn’t purposely abusing their kid. The poem uses the themes struggle and love to display this fact, as the first person perspective allows us to see the regularity of the dad’s drunkenness, and the child’s situation from the child himself. 

In the beginning stanza, Roethke’s poem explains that the child is dancing with his drunk father. The child describes his father as highly intoxicated, indicating his father reeked of alcohol, stating “The whiskey on your breath could make a small boy dizzy” (lines 1-2).  He then goes on to state that he had to hang on to his drunk father for life or death stating, “But I hung on like death, such waltzing was not easy” (lines 3-4). This is where the theme of struggle comes into play, and this theme continues on from this first stanza, until the end of the poem, until the end of the child’s frightening night. His indication of the fact his father was drunk, combined with the fact he was having to hold on for dear life, shows the son was struggling. In any situation a parent is drunk, and a kid is very young, it can be very scary. It can be a struggle for a kid to make it through the night emotionally and physically intact, as any slight mess up can result in the kid getting a much harsher punishment than usual. This is the kind of situation that this child is in. He is holding on for dear life because he has no choice but to do so. If he does anything wrong, his father could perhaps respond much stronger than usual. Not only is this a high possibility due to his drunkenness, but because the poem later on indicates the father may have an abuse history. In stanza three, it mentions the fathers hand is rough and battered on one knuckle, stating “The hand that held my wrist was battered on one knuckle” ( lines 9-10). With such evidence being in the poem itself, it is extremely apparent his father may have a history of child abuse.

The following stanza continues to describe the situation the child was being put in by the father. In stanza two, the poem discusses the manner in which the father was dancing with the son. Hinted by the word “waltzing” in stanza one, the dance is one more of a drunken waltz. The son is holding on for dear life, as his father is wobbling back and forth, knocking over items. The situation is described vividly, with words such as “romped” “slid” and “unfrown” allowing the reader to fully understand just how rough the situation is for the young boy. While his father is just playing with him, and he and his dad are just dancing, the descriptive word use describing his mother shows that the situation could take a left turn any minute. Not only does the description of her face show that the situation could go bad, but her lack of action does as well. If this was just the first time, she would be caught off guard, and more likely to say something or intervene. However, she doesn’t. I believe she doesn’t because she has tried before, and it only made the situation worse. Her face says it all. She wants to take the child’s pain away, intervene and help, but she can’t. She knows from prior experience she would only make it worse by intervening. So she sits there, and the poem states “My mother’s countenance could not unfrown herself” (lines 7-8). 

In stanza three the poem goes into further lengths to describe the dancing taking place between the father and the son, and in my opinion shows proof of child abuse. It talks about how the father has a forceful wrist grip on the kid, and describes the battered knuckle I mentioned earlier. The poem explains this by saying “The hand that held my wrist was battered on one knuckle” (lines 9-10). This line is a strong indication of child abuse. As I stated before, the way the kid reacts to the drunk dancing, the fact his mother doesn’t intervene, combined with the fact the father has a battered knuckle, shows there is a strong chance the father has a history of child abuse. Strangely enough however, stanza three is where the theme of love comes into play. The kid loves his father, and while this can be hard to see because of the evidence of abuse throughout the stanza and the poem itself, you can tell he loves his father by the way he writes. Since the poem is being told from a first person perspective, the words of this poem are the words of the child. Even when the child is speaking about his father’s issues, he doesn’t show any malice towards him, or hate. He may hate when his dad gets drunk, but nothing in the poem shows he hates his father when he isn’t drunk. Stanza three is the perfect example of this theme, because even when he talks about possible abuse, he doesn’t seem angry at his father. Simple fact is, the child loves his father, and we know this by how he speaks about his father’s mistakes.

The final stanza wraps up the theme of struggle, depicting more abuse by the father toward the son. The final stanza is the nail in the coffin, as it is obvious that the abuse from the father is real, and cannot be doubted in anyway. The child states “You beat time on my head with a palm caked hard by dirt, Then waltzed me off to bed, still clinging to your shirt” (lines 13-16). With statements by the child like these, it is apparent to me the kid is being abused by his father. However, I feel the child abuse in this scenario, this night, is unintentional. Although the words in the poem about his knuckles, and the way the mother and son react to the father lead one to believe and know that the father has a past of intentional child abuse, the story of tonight’s situation doesn’t seem intentional. The father and son are just dancing, and although the kid is being injured in the last stanza, the wording leads one to see the injuries are accidental. When you are drunk, you tend to me heavier handed. High fives are stronger, kicks are done with more strength, and any other action you do you accidently put more force behind than intended. Since the father is dancing with his young son, it’s more than likely he was just patting on the kids head with his hand, as hitting someone on the head with your palm isn’t the most common way of child abuse. If the man intentionally hurt him, the child would describe the hit with more menace, instead of simply just stating his father beat his head with his palm. He also would more than likely close his fist, as a palm isn’t going to cause the most pain. Also, the belt can be easily explained, as since the father is much taller than the kid it is likely the father’s belt buckle is about as high as the child’s ear. However regardless if this abuse is intentional or not, it is still child abuse. If the father wasn’t drunk, it’s likely he wouldn’t be hurting the child at all. He would pay more attention to his belt, he wouldn’t beat his hand over the child’s head, and the dancing would be much more cohesive. 

With that said, after reading the poem it is apparent there is a much deeper meaning in the poem than to just display a sad case of child abuse between a small boy and his alcoholic father. As most writers do, Theodore Roethke has a meaning much less shallow than just a story, and I believe the goal of this poem was to show how child abuse can be not only be intentional, but accidental. While Roethke gives the impression the child has been abused on multiple occasions by his father in intentional ways, the poem itself also eludes to the fact that the situation the child is placed in during the poem wasn’t intentional. By showing that his father is merely dancing with the boy, and that the injuries occurring to the child are just simply occurring due to the fact the father is stumbling around, it is apparent his father in this case isn’t trying to hurt the child. He just is too drunk to dance properly. As I stated earlier, the father would able to dance just fine if he wasn’t drunk, and these injuries are just occurring because he has less control of his body. From the too hard pats on the head, to the accidental belt scraping on the kids ear, the injuries are just ones coming from a far too gone father, not an enraged irresponsible parent. The fact is, the injuries aren’t occurring because the father intends to hurt the child, but because he is clumsy drunk. This leads me to believe his point in showing a case where a usually intentional abusive father is accidentally hurting his child is to show all angles of child abuse. A lot of people believe that child abuse is always a case in which a parent purposively abuses there kid, when in fact a lot of times child abuse is neither the parents intent or obvious. He wrote this to show child abuse, like all stories, comes in different packages and involves different situations. He wants people to see child abuse from all spectrums, not just from the social norm or only from one lens. Child abuse happens in multiple ways, and Roethke does an amazing job of showing how even an intentionally abusive parent can also be an accidentally abusive one as well.

Throughout the poem, the themes of struggle and love are apparent. From the unintentional child abuse occurring, the child abuse history hinted at, to the fact the kid doesn’t speak badly about a man who treats him terribly at times, the poem is one that screams the struggle of love. It shows loving someone who messes up and treats you terribly is hard, and that sometimes those who love you treat you the exact opposite. The life of a child can sometimes be hard, and sometimes be easy. In this case, this child’s life is difficult. His father abuses him, abuses alcohol, and maybe even his wife. However, even a small child can see through a man’s weakness. His love for his father is apparent, and it is also apparent he knows his father has an issue with alcohol, not an actual issue with him. Sadly, alcohol is a deadly love affair for his father, and that is why his son is struggling. That is why he abuses the child, and that is what the poem is about. 
