Throughout history women’s rights have always been hindered in some way. Even today many still believe that women are not treated equally as men. The women’s rights movement has been progressively moving towards their goal of complete equality. The movement has come a long way if you compare today to the 1800’s. In the 1800’s women were almost a sex slave, and were not given any personal rights whatsoever(Loyola University). Women were told what to do with their body and never consulted on what they wanted. Today, women have the right to vote, abortion and many others. In the story “Where are you going, where have you been?” by Joyce Carol Oates, Connie is a young girl struggling to find herself and begins to act like two completely different people. Her parents are very strict and want her to be all orderly and proper while she wants to be able to do as she wants and be herself. When home she acts all proper and sweet then when she goes out she lies about where she goes in an attempt to meet older men. She tries to act a certain way to appeal to older men for she wants to explore her sexuality. One night she meets Arnold at the diner and he was creepy and did not give off a good vibe. The story which takes place in the 1960s can be compared to the women’s rights movement also going on in the 60s. Joyce Carol Oates may have been inspired to write this story to express her feelings towards the subject. The elements in the story such as her controlling parents, her two unique and different personalities, and the way Arnold treats Connie represents the unfairness in real-world society that women of all ages faced in this time period.

Throughout the story it is emphasized that her parents were strict and wanted her to act nice and proper. Her parents wanted her to act older and mature like her 24-year-old sister but Connie was only fifteen. Her dad neglected her and would hardly speak to anyone and her mother was always on her about something. In our human history, women were always told what they could and couldn’t do and that can be compared to how her parents treat her. Women were not allowed to use birth control until 1960(Imbornoni). Birth control is a sex contraceptive that can be used different ways that alter a women’s hormone cycle, thus preventing her from getting pregnant. Due to the fact that women were not allowed to use this they had no way of truly avoiding getting pregnant. Then when they got pregnant they had to have the baby because abortion was illegal up until 1973(Imbornoni). The rights movement expressed their discontent in the fact that someone could tell them what they could/couldn’t do with their own body(Loyola University). Similar to Connie’s mother telling her what to do and making her responsible for so many things at such a young age. The expectations were unreal and unfair for a 15-year-old girl. Basically, her parents wanted to act like her older sister which forced her to grow up faster than she should have. The fact that Connie’s life when she is out being so secretive shows how well-mannered she had to be at home. This is where her two personas come in. One when she is home and one when she is out.

In the story Connie lives two completely different lives, but she is no Hannah Montana. Her life at home is depressing and she hates it, she often daydreams of going out and doing what she wants. Obviously, she has a preference of who she wants to be but she is not allowed to act the way she would if she was out when she is home. When Connie and her friend go to the late-night diner she goes in search of boy’s attention. She molds her looks and personality to make herself appealing to the older men she is around to gain their approval. In one particular night, she spends three hours hanging out with an older guy named Eddie in an alley. Any mother would not be happy with that kind of behavior. This element of the story can be compared to the women’s social movement of the 1900’s where they wanted to have independence from men and wanted to feel worth (Loyola University). Until women were given the right to vote in the early 1900’s they were almost like property. They felt like a slave and were used for sex and to clean(Loyola University). This is compared to the story when Connie goes out, she acts totally different and that is because she wants to feel like she can make her own decisions. She wants to feel as if she has worth, she does that by changing her appearance and being someone who she isn’t just to gets the boys attention. She wants the guys to be following her around and have a gender reversal. She wants to feel like she is the one in charge and not have to be any persons’ sex slave. Another big thing that was a problem for women during this problem was that they lost their sexual innocence at such a young age. Women were forced into sex early and it caused them to grow up faster than the ideal(Loyola University). Connie shows this by growing up too fast by having too much pressure on her then going out and having sex to release some stress from her life at home. This is not how the ideal women in society wanted to be treated. Connie realizes in the end that going out and meeting boys is not what she wants. Arnold is giving her the attention she wanted but she doesn’t want it anymore. She quickly realizes that she is not the one in charge and does not have much choice but to do as he says. 

Arnold Friend is no friend of Connie. One night at the late-night diner she walks past him and he basically gives her a cat call and expresses his interest in her. Arnold seems creepy and extreme. He comes across as very violent and forceful. Even his gold car gives off a good vibe but ultimately creepy because it seems too good to be true. Connie’s appearance gives off the idea that she wants sex and attention. Arnold’s personality is an extension of real-world men. He symbolizes the way men treated women during the social movement, and that is with little respect. Arnold gives off the perception that he is forceful and does not care if Connie wants him or not. Connie virtually has no choice for in the end he just grabs her and gives no opportunity but to come with him. In the real-world women were seen and used as toys and that is the way Arnold perceives Connie. In 1976 rape was made illegal for married couples(Imbornoni). Rape is still a serious issue even today, but back before women gained equality they were forced upon by their husbands and assaulted sexual and physically. Women are not toys and should not be seen as toys, just because a woman wears something that shows a little too much does not mean that they want the man. Men perceive a woman wearing these types of clothes and think that the woman is interested in him but really that is not the case at all. A woman should be able to express herself without feeling violated by men. Arnold and Connie can be compared to this because Connie wears what makes her feel good about herself and Arnold takes it as she wants him when it is obviously not the case. This can also be compared to how throughout history woman have been misunderstood. Woman have been fighting for equality for hundreds of years and men still to this day do not understand how woman suffer every day from things not being equal(Loyola University).

History tends to repeat itself and woman throughout history have constantly been disrespected sexually, physically and emotionally. This story written in the 1960’s expresses the writer’s beliefs that woman are treat unequally and uses her writing to try to gain support for her cause. She uses elements in the story like her strict parents, Connie’s two personalities, and Arnolds way of treating Connie to symbolize how woman are mistreated throughout history and still in the 60s. Even today with the Brock Turner case, woman are still mistreated. Society needs to work together to bring equality to men and woman.
