
When we think of waltz, we imagine a lovely couple dancing around and around to the lilting music. As they look into each other’s eyes, they share joy and affection that originate from the waltz. Ironically, in Roethke’s poem “My Papa’s Waltz,” the positive notions of the waltz are depicted as violent and rather abusive images. However, when examined in depth, the poem presents an adult speaker struggling to come to terms with childhood memory that reveals the father’s clumsiness at expressing his love for his son, and that the waltz was a way to build their love and relationship. The images and diction in this poem closely describe the qualities of the waltz and implicitly express the speaker’s ambivalent feelings toward his father.

The first stanza of Roethke’s poem focuses on the waltz and serves as a metaphor for the characters’ rocky relationship. In their waltz, the father is heavily drunk from the whiskey, and the little boy feels dizzy from his father’s breath. Based on this description, it is easy to misinterpret that the son is forced to waltz with his drunken father. However, the truth is that the son neither resists waltzing nor hates his father for being drunk because he strives to waltz as best as he can as he, “hung on like death” (Line 3) to his father. Of course, as the poem reads, “such waltzing was not easy” (Line 4). This phrase not only tells waltzing is quite challenging because the father is drunk, but also functions as an illustration of the poor relationship between the father and his son. However, what makes “such waltzing not easy” was because the father waltzes with his son only when he is drunk; he rarely spends time with his son on a daily basis. From this, we understand that the father is not the kindest or the friendliest father to his son. Yet, he is merely unfamiliar with those kind and loving expressions, and he truly knows, in his heart, that he loves his son to death. That is why the father gets intoxicated in an attempt to cope with his usual clumsiness at expressing love to his son. The son also loves his father very much and knows that waltzing gives him precious time to spend with his father, which explains why he could endure the smell of the alcohol from the father. 

While the first stanza uses a metaphor to describe their poor relationship, the second stanza provides a detailed description of their inelegant waltz, showing their effort to recover the relationship. The father and his son waltzed and “romped until the pans / Slid from the kitchen shelf” (5-6). The phrase “we romped” implies that both the father and his son enjoy waltzing together and are happy about their waltz. If the theme of this poem was actually child abuse, then the speaker would have chosen a different phrase. Connecting with the interpretation above, their waltz is obviously inelegant as they are messing up the kitchen. The mother’s “countenance / Could not unfrown itself” (Line 7-8) from watching them waltzing. This does not portray that she is angry about the situation, but rather demonstrates that she is unwillingly watching two mischievous “boys” dancing and causing such troubles in the house. Furthermore, she knows that waltzing is their only time to be close together, so she does not interrupt them. She allows them to dance however they want because she does not want to ruin their occasional bonding time. Her face is frowned only because she is worried about her son getting hurt physically and emotionally. Her action supports the claim that the relationship between the father and his son needs much improvement.

In the third stanza, we can observe how the father and his son are sacrificing themselves to express their love of each other from the clumsy waltz:

The hand that held my wrist

Was battered on one knuckle;

At every step you missed

My right ear scraped a buckle.

Since the father is waltzing when he is not fully sober, he cannot lead his son carefully. The father’s missteps symbolize his illusion, thinking that leading his son at his tempo will fix their inelegant waltz, as well as their rocky relationship. However, a buckle on the father’s jacket scrapes the son’s ears, and the son’s knuckle batters the father’s hand. Despite their physical scratches, neither of them says a word about it and continues to waltz. These images appeal to the senses and may seem violent. However, for the father and his son, the chance to make the relationship work better trumps the physical discomfort from the dance. They are sharing their feelings, but just in a different way through waltzing rather than verbal communication.

The last stanza of this poem reveals the father’s true love for his son despite his clumsiness. When the father beats time on his son’s head, the son notices that his father’s palm is “caked hard by dirt” (14). His dirty hands imply that the occupation of the father requires long and hard physical labor. The father’s clumsiness at expressing his love to his son is not the only obstacle in the relationship. His job is another barrier because the father does not have enough time to be with his son. The father is frustrated about this situation because his job that provides food on the table for his family is what causes an awkward relationship between the father and his son. Therefore, he drinks whiskey to ease up his emotional pains, and then comes home to waltz with his son. Knowing this, the son always wants to waltz with his father because the waltz is more important than the smell of the alcohol. This is why even though the father waltzes his son off to bed, his son is “still clinging to your [the father’s] shirt” (Line 16). The son wants to maximize the limited time he has with his father. In addition, the son feels compassionate about his drunken father and his coarse hands.

By analyzing this poem in depth, we come to understand that it depicts negative images of a positive relationship between the father and his son. Its detailed descriptions stimulate the readers to sympathize with the son’s feelings and take a journey into the readers’ own childhood memories with their fathers. Fathers can be clumsy with expressing their feelings to their beloved children. However, as this poem conveys, true love does not depend on how well we express our love to one another. Our ways of expressions are just different; the depth of our own love is greater than anybody else’s.
