Generally speaking when we talk about abortion the focus of the discussion is with the mother and the unborn child. While there is clearly another person who is responsible for the child's life, the father is often blamed or his concerns or feelings remain un-noticed.  After researching abortion I found that in most cases the mother was the only parent spoken of or concerned about.  A commonality in many women's stories that I read about mentioned that their decisions were heavily influenced by their significant others such as boyfriends or husbands. I want to ask why the father has no legal rights to stop an abortion yet many women are clearly being influenced by them regardless. It seems that if they are having such a large influence then they should too have legal rights. The father is just as much responsible for the child as the mother, it needs to be recognized that the father is losing the same child as the mother and he should be treated as so.

One of the first sources that I looked at was one of personal testimonies; on the site there are topics to choose from such as forced abortions, women who regret their abortions, fathers of aborted children etc. After reading through many of the stories most women regret their abortions or feel as though they were coerced into making the decision. The research on this website highlights the idea that women should have complete and final say in regards to aborting their child. It is between the woman and her body. I want to use this to Segway into the idea that men are being blamed for far too much in these situations. How can the father be blamed for the conception, for forcing the decision of the abortion and not have any actual rights?  It seems as though it should be one way or the other. However by using the testimonies from the mothers I am not trying to place blame on them either but I am going to use the stories to show how strong of an influence the fathers are having. There are also some stories from men who have chosen to speak out about their personal stories that I think will make this claim more real. Many men do not speak out about their experiences but the few that do make you really think about how the decision to abort a child should not be only the choice of the mother. Not only am I going to use the stories from the fathers' points of view but I am also going to use the mother's view as well. Women have the complete say in abortion because it is their body and they are the one who carry the child for nine months. To try and understand a solution that would not damage or traumatize only the mother or the father I need to take research from both perspectives. 

Having an abortion is a huge decision and one that seems to effect people for many years there after. Many women are offered therapy, condolences, and over all support from people after having an abortion but the fathers are often forgotten or assumed to have not been affected as greatly as the mother. There are very few accommodations or support services for men who have also lost a child through abortion. It seems to be a common misconception of society that men do not feel sadness or do not experience loss the same way that a woman does, or that they are to manly to show that they are grieving or depressed. Men deserve to be treated as though they are a parent of the child before birth just as much as they are treated as a father after birth. The research I have found has indicated that many men wish they were given the same support and respect that the mothers are receiving and those fathers who receive counseling or therapy suffer far less anxiety and anger. Some studies have even showed that the fathers in some cases are affected in stronger ways then the mother. By this I mean that because they felt helpless or useless in stopping the abortion their guilt lies deeper and more intensely. This is something that is hard to measure but if you think about any situation where something tragic happened and there was no one there to comfort or protect you. The feeling is dark and extreme. This part of my paper will show the clinical and mental help that the fathers deserve but are not being given. I also want to talk about the Father's Rights Movement and the group of people who are devoted to helping these men who have lost children to abortion. 

Although fathers have zero rights regarding abortion or even being told prior to an abortion that it is happening, they seem to still be extremely influential. In 1987 the Alan Guttmacher Institute at U.S. abortion facilities conducted a study that looked at the reasons women were having abortions and the circumstances surrounding each situation. "When women were asked why they were having abortions, 23% said their husband or partner wanted her to have an abortion, 68% said they could not afford a baby now, and 51% said they had problems with a relationship or wanted to avoid single parenthood" (Strahan 196). After reading these statistics it does not make much sense to say that an abortion is between only the woman and her body. There is a clear third party involved, and it is the father. In 1974-1975 a study was done involving Columbian women, "if the male partner advised abortion, the woman too steps to obtain an abortion in 70% of the cases" (Strahan 198). Women have complete control over the pregnancy and deciding whether or not they want to keep the child. The father's actions and involvement are based off of what the mother decides. The mother holds all the cards in the end on deciding whether or not the child will be carried to term.  Still women are making their decisions to abort their children largely based on the father and his wishes. It seems as though the father should have legal rights.

While I am arguing the rights of the fathers it is also clear through research that the father is not always as involved as previously spoken about. The research I found on one site discusses how some men completely disengage upon hearing of their partner's pregnancy. This can make the woman feel trapped and alone and pressured into the idea that her only saving grace is to abort the child. In some instances the fathers that were studied seemed to resent the child and feel threatened by it, and consequently wanting nothing to do with it. If the mother can see this and is aware of this, this was her reason to abort the child because she knew there would be underling and psychological issues later down the road. These are things that women were scared about prior to having the abortion. Another reason why the fathers disengaged or reacted negatively towards the news was because they had financial issues. They felt less like a man if they could not support their partner and child, so they saw the only way out was to not have the child.

Abortion is a tricky topic to discuss and research because it is directly involving human life. The father and mother are both responsible for the creation of the child. An aspect of this topic I am considering addressing as well is how the mother not only has the ability to abort the child without the consent of the father but she also has complete control over the whole situation and the situations that follow after.  The decision should be mutual.

Dr. Keith Ablow is a psychiatrist that is fighting for the right for a father to be able to veto an abortion if he is willing and able to care for the child himself. If  he can prove that he will, himself, raise the child and it is a better decision then the abortion then the woman's choice to abort the child can be vetoed and the father gains full custody after birth.  He says "We are ignoring the quiet message that current abortion policy conveys to every American male: You have no voice in, and, therefore, no responsibility for, the pregnancies which you help to create. Your descendants are disposable, at the whim of the women you choose to be intimate with" (Dr. Keith Ablow).  This is very controversial because it seems like a very hard thing to have a woman carry a child to term and then have to give it up when she was seeking an abortion but it is also unfair to the fathers who wish to keep and raise the children the mothers are aborting. If it gets to the  point were men do have the rights to veto an abortion it will be very tricky. There are questions of what if the woman is too late in her terms before a decision is made? And that the father should pay for all medical aspects. A father should have more rights and this Fathers' movement is the first step.  

Abortion is not a black and white topic, it is something that most people will never agree on. However I think giving the father rights with abortion will lead to less controversy. I know that the idea of a woman carrying to term only to give her child to the father while she wanted to have an abortion can seem crazy at first but taking away the child of the father against his will is more wrong. Not only will it save more lives but it will also help fathers to be more responsible and acknowledge that they should be able to save the life of their child.
